Privacy

Since college started, I've always felt an excitement that I was able to keep secrets from my family. To have  a distance and a privacy that I thought I couldn't have before. Our family has always been close but in my mind, I needed this space to myself as I spread my wings. There are good and bad things in this mindset. It was fun. But for most of the time, I was lonely. No matter how much I try to open up to people, there are always some fabrication as I tell them my story and see their eyes, I simply cannot expose the whole truth. But for the sakes of my morals, I cannot do it anymore. It's wrong to lie and it's a burden to carry. I strive to be different this year. I promise to hold an integrity to my family and my friends. I'll start telling my friends enough to understand me and for me to keep my private life private. However, with my family, I should start telling them more things about myself because that's how I know I have matured and am capable of making wise decisions. Plus, it feels so childish to have to hide and cover up my actions. I need the confidence to display to the people I love who I really am in order for them to trust me and to support me when I need them most. My family has shown me so much trust by disclosing the most private and secretive things to me that it is only fair that I do the same thing. Lastly, the truth is simple. It's not complicated and troublesome as the chain of lies one can tell. White lies, guilty lies, and entertaining lies. Perhaps I had told them all. And that's not an accomplishment I'm proud of.